Yea... I see you...

And I bet you see me.












No?





I'm around here somewhere....











Over there. On your frosty ass porch!







































Took you long enough... Hi. I'm a grumpy ass bird. Heck, I'm THE grumpy ass bird. I'm the one who chirps at 4 in the morning when you are trying to sleep. I'm the one who holds it until you wash your car. I'm the one who shoots for your forehead when you look up. To be short, I'm your worst God damned nightmare, punk.

Wanna fight about it?

Of course you don't. Your scared. Scared of all this. Maybe you watched too many Hitchcock films as a kid, I don't know, all I know is that you are over there making your shoes into a birdbath while I sit here, watching you do it. I bet you even crapped youself a bit. Your daughter is going to laugh at you and you will realize at that moment what a pathetic waste your life has been. The classes you've taken at the Y, your diploma at some cow college, your "loving" family, they are all meaningless wastes of time on a pathetic lump like you.

Oh, and so you know, my scrubby little bird dick is still bigger than yours is.

Bitch.

Just thought I'd drop by and let you know.

Say "Pudgy Bunny" to your wife for me, she'll know what you are talkin' about. I'll see you around... real soon.