Poetry Session

After having conjured up the poem for Naught during my American Literature survey, I held onto my momentum and wrote some more crap too.

Haiku

Winter sorrows come,
Frozen flowers felled by frost,
Hey, I just farted.

(It alliterates)

Women in the crowd,
Do their titties see my stare?
I await the slap.

Some girls must love me,
But their lying lips say, "No!"
Restraining Order.

Beer makes the girls say,
"Patrick looks handsome tonight."
I am a bad man.

Free Form Poetry

Sometimes I feel like a nut,
Sometimes I don't,
Almond Joy's got nuts,
Mound's don't.
Sometimes I question the wisdom of writing poetry while watching TV.
Usually I don't.

Poetry is a sham,
Just another stupid scam,
For the men who want some pussy,
They just act sensitive and wussy.
So young women I emplore thee!
Please, oh please do not ignore me!
Find a doctor, lawyer, or a banker boy.
You can treat them like a toy,
They will buy you happiness,
And when you are bored there's always the pool boy's penis.

I'm a lot more fun when I've had coffee.